`jess ٩(●̮̮̃•̃)۶ (embryo_ed) wrote,
`jess ٩(●̮̮̃•̃)۶

How Johnny is perceived by the Johnnys

I found this in a thread on XQ and thought it's interesting so I've decided to translate. I spent quite a long time compiling these so please tell me if you're going to repost :)

NOTE: This may not be 100% accurate since I haven't heard/seen the Johnnys revealing the secrets about Johnny myself and some of the information on XQ are contradictory. Feel free to contribute if you remember what other Johnnys said about Johnny and I'll add it in :) ><

Digging Johnny's past
Johnny, actual name Hiromu Kitagawa (喜多川 擴),, was born October 23 1931 in Los Angeles.

Johnny once worked in the US embassy in Japan as a translator and mediator. He then joined the army and took part in the North Korean war (as a translator/mediator as well).  After the war, Johnny used the money given by the US government for his universitiy fees in 智上大学.

Impressions of Johnny
Clips of Johnnys talking about Johnny: http://www.youv.jp/video/atrp0f-s-1-0-0-%E3%82%B8%E3%83%A3%E3%83%8B%E3%83%BC%E3%81%95%E3%82%93/

Firstly, the reason why Johnny refer to people as YOU is because..
He can't remember their names :D And the disadvantage of that?

Someone: At the backstage, when Johnny shouted "YOU!", everyone turned around.

And now on to what different people said about dear Johnny Kitagawa.

Sho on a certain Heyx3 episode: Someone sent a picture of a two-month old toddler to the agency. Johnny flew into a rage and said "What's this??! We're not a child-care centre/nursery!!"


Jun: Jun's dad apparently worked in an egg-processing factory. When Johnny heard that, he asked Jun "Is your dad a hen?" 

Arashi on how they were selected?!
: Before Arashi's debut, Nino and Jun were standing around one day when Johnny asked them if they could play volleyball. Jun and Nino answered yes and started playing and that's how they got selected. Johnny also called Aiba to ask if he had a passport. Aiba said yes and debuted in Hawaii a week later. In reply to Ohno saying he wants to quit Johnnys, Johnny asked Ohno to help out with a recording- A.RA.SHI. Ohno asked why he has a solo part and Johnny just said it's fine and asked him to sing it. After he sang, Johnny asked if Ohno has a passport and Ohno was off to Hawaii for Arashi' debut conference.

Arashi: When sho's using the phone, if he's all serious and formal, he's most likely talking to the manager. When he's casual and informal, it's johnny.

Ohno Satoshi (I misread it as Nagase earlier on) and Okada Junichi: Johnny once had this conversation with Ohno .
Johnny: do YOU know how to play volleyball? 
Ohno: NO! *thinking he would be stuck with volleyball with the rest of his life should he answer yes*
Johnny then approached Okada
Johnny: Do YOU know how to play volleyball?
Okada: Yeah
A few days later, Okada debuted as V6.
Ohno: If I had answered"yes" at that time, I would have been part of v6.

Kanjani8 on a certain Heyx3 episode as well as KAT-TUN in a 2006 con: Johnny tried asking an air-hostess for a Sprite but his pronunciation was bad. He said "SPRIT" thrice but the air-hostess did not understand. Anxious, Johnny shrieked "SEVEN UP!"

Kanjani8: K8 were pulling a prank in a recording studio when Johnny, who was directing something next door, walked in. Johnny saw what they were doing, took his stuff and left without any reaction. K8 thought they have gotten into trouble and braced themselves to be scolded by the manager but Johnny didn't raise the issue at all.

Yokoyama Yu: Johnny came over to where the kansai jrs trained and announced "I'm the world's Johnny".

Yokoyama Yu
: Also, apparently Johnny saw Yoko being called "Ossan" on a TV show and hence went to find 4 jrs in Kansai Jrs with initials forming "O S A N" to form the group OSSAN.

Yokoyama Yu: There was once when Yoko and Johnny were having a meal together when Johnny said to him"Why don't you be called Yokoyama Joe?"
"YOU look like a foreigner so why not Yokoyama Henry?"
"How about Go" (already used by morita go)
"How about Jun"
Yoko: Please.. stop changing it..
Yoko: A while later I had a shock when i switched on the TV.  So I'm "Yokoyama Yu" ?

Yokoyama Yu: Regarding Yoko's solo con, Johnny said "Well you can just go up the stage with a microphone, I allow you to talk (MC) for more than half of the concert"

SMAP: The three most common lines of Johnny in the past were "Nakai you talk too much!! Kimura you're angry again! Goro~ You danced wrongly again!!"

SMAP: Apparently there was a time when Nakai and Kimura Takuya fought backstage, resulting in Kimura Takuya appearing on screen with his face injured. Johnny then set this rule "No injuring of the face when fighting".

Nakai or Kimura Takuya: Johnny used to say Nakai wouldn't live past 32 years. When Nakai was 33 years old, he told Johnny "I'm 33 years old already" and Johnny said "You're still alive?!"

Kimura Takuya: Johnny's afraid Kimura Takuya's long blonde hair would negatively influence the rest of SMAP. He said
"YOU don't lead GORO astray"

Apparently Johnny didn't get along well with Kimura Takuya at all. Staff used to hear them quarelling from the corridor. Johnny also used to call Kimura Takuya "The rat faeces that destroys the entire pot of soup".

Kimura Takuya (on his radioshow): Johnny would announce "Today's my birthday!!" on his birthday. However no one ever knew how old he's.

KAT-TUN: There was once in the 2002 KAT-TUN concert where Kame fought with Ueda over wrong dance positions. They were brought to Johnny who said, "YOU were fighting over work matters, that's kakkoi/please fight more!"

Kame: When Kame was young, he hated practices and often skipped practices to play baseball. A long time later, Johnny called and asked why he didn't attend practices. Kame replied that he wanted to play baseball and Johnny told Kame "You can play baseball here as well". Kame then joined J2000. In the middle of a drama filming in 2005, he missed one of the baseball matches. Johnny furiously called Kame up and asked why he didn't attend the baseball match. Kame said he's filming drama and Johnny said "Don't bother about the drama!! YOU come to the baseball field immediately".

Ueda: When Ueda first auditioned for Johnnys, he was bald. Johnny patted his head and said "A bald head is good" and allowed him to enter.

KinKi Kids: KinKi Kids went to watch a stageshow in New York with Johnny. Prior to going, Johnny said, "You guys will definitely fall asleep!". KinKi kids defended themselves saying, "No we won't! Let's go! Let's go!" In the end, KinKi Kids watched the show intently while Johnny fell asleep. After the first act, Johnny said to them, "Let's go back, you two lousy fellas have fallen asleep".
Koichi: Why did he throw a rage at us? Wasn't he the one who fell asleep??


KinKi Kids: KinKi kids always mention Johnny in their concerts. There was once backstage when Johnny called them over and said "YOU, stop mentioning me". And well... KinKi kids leaked that out as well along with many other johnny incidents :D 

KinKi Kids: There was once when Johnny went to find KinKi Kids at the backstage and because he didn't look familiar to the staff there, he wasn't permitted entry. They even thought Johnny's a cleaner. Johnny then left fuming.

KinKi Kids: When KinKi Kids held an overseas concert, Johnny followed. Although the weather on one of the concert days was bad, the fans still queued up and waited patiently for the concert to begin. Johnny was probably touched and instructed KinKi Kids to write cards to the fans. Johnny then personally distributed the cards to the fans. However, no one realized he's Johnny.

Koichi: Johnny said whoever can speak Japanese can act in doramas! 

Koichi (angrily to Tsuyoshi): Whenever KinKi Kids did something wrong and were called in by Johnny, why was it always me who's scolded? Even when Tsuyoshi's the one who did something wrong!

Koichi: Recently, Johnny called me early in the morning.
Johnny: I'm Johnny. Actually nothing's up.
Koichi: Nothing's up??
There were times as well when Johnny called and said "Who's that?"


Koichi: Johnny is old fashioned and timid at times. There was once when Johnny personally brought KinKi Kids to Taiwan for a concert and booked the entire hotel. However, the air-conditioner in Johnny's room was faulty and leaking water. Johnny got frightened and exclaimed "WHAT HAPPENED WHAT HAPPENED???" (at this point, Koichi imitated Johnny by hopping around) Apparently Johnny thought his room was gonna flood.



Koichi: When Johnny was overseas, there was once when he gave me a long-distance call and exclaimed " Julia Roberts is now swimming downstairs!!"
Tsuyoshi: Nah.. it's Cameron Diaz isn't it?
Koichi: Ah one of them.


Tsuyoshi: Tsuyoshi went out for a meal with Johnny on Johnny's birthday and wanted to treat him. However, he went to the washroom and when he's out, Johnny already settled the bill for both of them. After Tsuyoshi finished a bowl of noodles, Johnny said, "come let's go eat ramen!" 

Tsuyoshi: Also, on a certain show when Tsuyoshi was shown a refrigerator, he exclaimed "Ah~ This refrigerator is exactly the same as that of Johnny's" 

Tsuyoshi: In 2002, Tsuyoshi dyed a strand of his hair silver. Johnny saw it in a concert and said to Tsuyoshi, "This hairstyle of YOUrs is really nice". Hearing this, Tsuyoshi went to change his hairstyle. Upon being asked why he did so, Tsuyoshi said, "Because Johnny said it's nice". 

A few days later, Tsuyoshi appeared with a sheep-like hairstyle. Kimura Takuya saw it and commented that it's ugly and that it made Tsuyoshi look like an Obasan. Tsuyoshi then changed his hairstyle once more, the reason being "because Kimura Takuya said it's ugly" this time round.

Tsuyoshi: Because of Johnny's encouragement to go ahead to do whatever he wants, Tsuyoshi submitted a proposal for his EE solo project. He expected criticisms for his proposal but it was approved immediately. Because Tsuyoshi was troubled over not being able to choose a suitable venue, he went to consult Johnny.
Johnny: Why don't you go and build one yourself?
Tsuyoshi: Build one myself?
Johnny: Ah, Yokohama then. 

Tsuyoshi (to audience in a concert): Just now Johnny told me backstage "You sang really really well! And you have a group of outstanding fans".

Tsuyoshi (on Love Love episode 100 sp where KinKi Kids were guests): There was once when Johnny went to take a look at the Jr's dance practice. Seeing how the Jrs were dancing, Johnny said, "I can't understand what YOU are dancing? YOU should dance like me"
At this point, Tsuyoshi imitated how Johnny was dancing then xD 
Everyone was laughing behind Johnny's back xD

Tsuyoshi: Basically explained how Johnny was proficient at avoiding the cameras found live. Please refer to screencaps below.
Cap 1: Say for example, if the camera is here..
Cap 2: And he's here watching..
Caps 3+4: If the camera here turns around with a "fa"
Cap 5: It'd become like this (Tsuyoshi imitates Johnny for this and demonstrates how the scene would show on the camera)
Cap 6: *Camera switches to show what Tsuyoshi, who's imitating Johnny, did* It'd become like this
Cap 7: If there's a table over here..
Cap 8: And the camera is pointing away
Cap 9+10: When the camera points in this (johnny's) direction
Cap 11+12: (He'd) disappear immediately (by covering his hands like what Tsuyoshi did)



Yoshihiko Inohara
Johnny to Inohara: Inohara's so ugly, his dog must be so pitiful.
Johnny to Inohara's dog: Your owner's eyes are so small, you're so pitiful. Your eyes are much bigger than your owner's.

Yoshihiko Inohara: There was once when Johnny went with Inohara and Sakamoto to the theme park. Inohara and Sakamoto waved to Johnny when they were on the ferris wheel and Johnny said "YOU (guys), that's dangerous."

Yoshihiko Inohara: When Inohara's still a Jr, Johnny went to his school and heard a shounentai or MATCHY song being played. He then asked Inohara if the school paid for the copyright fee.

Yoshihiko Inohara: Inohara was well-known for his single-eyelids. However, he can make himself double eye-lidded if he makes a face. Johnny once saw him making this fake double eye-lids and said "YOU look good like that, YOU go for plastic surgery".

Yoshihiko Inohara: Inohara's mum gave him an LV bag when he was young. Inohara loved that bag and carried it with him everywhere. Johnny saw the bag and 
Johnny: YOU! that bag of yours is an imitation.
Inohara: It's not an imitation! It's real!!
Johnny: Imitation!
*Inohara broke down into tears*
And years later, Johnnys would still bring up this topic about Inohara crying over his LV bag.

Masayuki Sakamoto:
Johnny: How old are YOU?
Sakamoto: 24..
Johnny: Oh great, you're leader then.

Sakamoto only understood what Johnny meant when v6 was formed the next day..

Okada Junichi: Johnny said, "YOU have a nice forehead" (inohara revealed this)

TOKIO: TOKIO was always scolded by Johnny for their unidol-likeness. And after being scolded by Johnny, apparently they had to write an apology letter. TOKIO held the record for being the group that wrote the most apology letters. Taichi once finished writing his apology letter and with a slip of tongue, asked, "I should sign here (on the apology letter) right?" Johnny got angry and said, "YOU think I'm a fan asking for your autograph??"

TOKIO: Johnny said "You can do whatever you want besides going completely naked"

TOKIO: There was another instance where TOKIO got too excited performing in their concert and stripped to their undies. Johnny flew into a rage and yelled, "YOU are idols, not strip artists. Do YOU know only wearing your undies while holding your guitars is like being completely naked?" 

Tegoshi/KAT-TUN: Johnny told Tegoshi/KAT-TUN "YOU, go sing this song". And the song's titled YOU.

Tegoshi (first appearance on heyx3 as tegomass): I had to dance but first I was asked, "YOU, how old are you?" At that time, I got the feeling that Johnny-san was the weird ojii-san. When asked how old I was, I said I was a third year middle-schooler and he said, "I thought you were in elementary school, huhu."

Tegomass: Johnny called both of them over and said "YOUたち、一緒に歌っちゃいなよ". The pairing was then formed.

Uchi (from a certain Wink Up article): Uchi was playing his video games during his audition. A strange old man then came over and said, "Why aren't YOU performing?" Uchi impatiently said, "I don't know how to". Johnny replied, "Just go run one round". Uchi did and got through the audition. After the audition, Johnny treated Uchi to ramen and lent him his handphone to call home. Uchi's mum then scolded Uchi for using a stranger's phone.

Takaki, on a certain Music Station episode: During the talk part of Music Station with HSJ. Takaki told a story about how he found out he was accepted into Johnny's.

Johnny called his house and Takaki's sister answered it. Takaki then goes on explaining that his sister's name was YU. So when Johnny called and referred to her as YOU she thought that Johnny was calling to talk to her ^^;

and apparently they talked for a long time and when they were finally finished Takaki asked who it was and she answered it was Johnny. Takaki was so shocked and before leaving his sister told him: "Oh by the way, you passed the audition"

TxT: Can we have a concert?
Johnny: I didn't plan one for you all in this year's schedule, don't hold a concert this year
TxT: Ah okay.
*a few days later*
Johnny: Why didn't YOU all hold a concert this year???

Koichi/Takky: Johnny called me in the middle of the night and the first thing he said was "who are you". Apparently this guy's number (not sure if it's koichi or takky) was stored as "YOU" on johnny's contact list.

A commentator who's very close to Johnny
said: Johnny was teaching the boys how to look at the camera on stage and how to pose star-like. I could see the big difference before and after Johnny's lesson. At the backstage of DBS, five members of KAT-TUN were in the lift with Johnny. Kame wasn't there because he's still in the bath. Johnny then commented "We're JAT-TUN!"

Someone: There was once when Johnny was barbequing a Pacific Saury and it attracted a fire-engine.

Yamapi on a certain heyx3 show appearing as shuji to akira: There was once when Johnny went out for a meal with everyone and everyone shouted "Johnny-san, Johnny-san". Johnny probably thought this wasn't good since he's too famous and exclaimed, "Don't call me Johnny-san, call me Boss! Boss!"

Someone: Johnny loves catching up with the latest electronic devices. But he's a little outdated. He bought an iPod, placed it in a leather casing and hung it around his waist.

Revealing the Johnny







Tags: johnny kitagawa, translations:other

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